This week was fun! We were all kind of nervous about transfers-- it's weird to contemplate not being here in Virginia haha. I've gotten so close with so many of the members and learned so much from the people here. Luckily, we all get to stay for at least the next six weeks! It's super nice to have 3 companions to hang out with and talk to. This week the new youth album came out, so we've had new music to listen to which has been wonderful! I can't wait till I get back and can finally listen to music with a nice setup that's loud. People get pretty upset when my speaker is blasting at 6:35 in the morning.
We meet with a few people weekly who are almost finished enduring to the end-- it's pretty difficult to see sometimes. Most of the time they are all great examples to me of happiness in the face of adversity, but sometimes they really struggle. This came to a head when one of them told us that they wanted to die and felt invisible. My companion said that the gospel and Jesus can strengthen us (which is totally true), but our friend said that he had no idea what the crushing heartbreak of the end of life is like. Which is also true. God sends 19-year-old young men to be his full-time servants all over the world. We preach messages of happiness and perform acts of service, and most of the time it's a pretty sweet gig. So our friend's unasked question was really, "how can you kids tell me anything that will make me feel better?" The truth is-- our words alone are hollow; they're cheap. I felt inspired to share one of the most heart wrenching stories in the Book of Mormon with him.
Alma gives up the judgement seat to go preach the gospel in the city Ammonihah. Nobody listens to him and he is thrown out of Ammonihah, but he labors much in the spirit-- wrestling with God in mighty prayer that he will be able to baptize them unto repentance. But nothing happens; they totally reject him. Alma, full of sorrow, is about to move on when he is visited by an angel who tells him to go back and try again. He returns speedily and meets Amulek! After teaching Amulek, they begin to teach together and with such power that even a crafty lawyer named Zeezrom is converted. I remember that when I was taught this story, that was where the story ended, but it doesn't. After they have had much success, the chief judge gets angry and binds them with cords and throws them into prison. Then the people take all the believers and their holy scriptures and cast them into the fire, and they make Alma and Amulek watch. They are forced to witness this awful scene and can do nothing. They do nothing because the spirit tells Alma that the believers must be burned in order for justice to come to the wicked. Then, after this, Alma and Amulek are spit on and beaten up. They are deprived of food and water and are naked. And they remain in prison for months if not years (many days is what it says). Only then are they finally delivered. After sharing this with our friend, I said that we might have no idea what suffering at the end of life is like, but I bet Alma and Amulek have an idea of what that suffering is like. Alma suffered so much even though he was faithful and obedient. Even though he was doing everything God asked.
Sometimes my mission feels like that. Sometimes life feels like that. God doesn't want us to suffer, he really doesn't. But part of taking up the cross and following him, I think, means that we need to be persecuted for His sake, spat upon and hated as He was. So we can truly become like Him. So we can recognize how great His sacrifice really was. But most importantly, so we can remember how totally dependent we are on Him. Because He had no one, we have someone. We have a Savior who with great mercy will succor us, always. I love you guys and know that God loves you even more!
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